THE SYNCREATE PODCAST: EMPOWERING CREATIVITY
HOSTED BY MELINDA ROTHOUSE, PHD
WELCOME TO SYNCREATE, WHERE WE EXPLORE THE INTERSECTIONS BETWEEN CREATIVITY,
PSYCHOLOGY, AND SPIRITUALITY. OUR GOAL IS TO DEMYSTIFY THE CREATIVE PROCESS,
AND EXPAND THE BOUNDARIES OF WHAT IT MEANS TO BE CREATIVE.
SUBSCRIBE / FOLLOW US ON SPOTIFY, APPLE PODCASTS, YOUTUBE
OR WHEREVER YOU GET YOUR PODCASTS
HOSTED BY MELINDA ROTHOUSE, PHD
WELCOME TO SYNCREATE, WHERE WE EXPLORE THE INTERSECTIONS BETWEEN CREATIVITY,
PSYCHOLOGY, AND SPIRITUALITY. OUR GOAL IS TO DEMYSTIFY THE CREATIVE PROCESS,
AND EXPAND THE BOUNDARIES OF WHAT IT MEANS TO BE CREATIVE.
SUBSCRIBE / FOLLOW US ON SPOTIFY, APPLE PODCASTS, YOUTUBE
OR WHEREVER YOU GET YOUR PODCASTS
EPISODE 92: SELF-MENTORING AND CREATIVITY
WITH MELINDA ROTHOUSE & CHARLOTTE GULLICK
listen to the audio podcast here:
WATCH THE FULL VIDEO VERSION HERE:
In this episode of our Creative Spark series, we discuss the inner mentor or inner coach as a counter-weight to the inner critic in our creativity, with inspiration from the book 10 to 25: The Science of Motivating Young People by David Yeager, a professor of psychology at UT Austin. The ways we both challenge and support ourselves through our inner self-talk can make a big difference in our creative success. Are we beating ourselves up or empowering ourselves for success through our inner narrative? This episode, like the mini-episodes that preceded it, also includes insights from our book, Syncreate: A Guide to Navigating the Creative Process for Individuals, Teams, and Communities.
For our Creativity Pro-Tip, we encourage you to pay attention to your self-talk and notice the tone and content of our inner narratives around our creativity. Our we critical and judgemental toward ourselves, or supportive and accepting?
Credits: The Syncreate podcast is created and hosted by Melinda Rothouse, and produced at Record ATX studios with in collaboration Michael Osborne and 14th Street Studios in Austin, Texas. Syncreate logo design by Dreux Carpenter.
If you enjoy this episode and want to learn more about the creative process, you might also like our conversations in
Episode 35: Navigating the Creative Wilderness
Episode 49: Creativity in Challenging Times
Episode 82: Healing the Creative Wound
At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you’re not sure how to get it off the ground, please reach out to us. Our book, also called Syncreate, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals. We also offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world, including a Monthly Creativity Coaching Group. You can find more information here on our website, where you can also find all of our podcast episodes.
Find and connect with us on social media and YouTube under Syncreate, and we’re now on Patreon as well.
If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review!
We’d love to hear your feedback as well, so drop us a line at [email protected].
For our Creativity Pro-Tip, we encourage you to pay attention to your self-talk and notice the tone and content of our inner narratives around our creativity. Our we critical and judgemental toward ourselves, or supportive and accepting?
Credits: The Syncreate podcast is created and hosted by Melinda Rothouse, and produced at Record ATX studios with in collaboration Michael Osborne and 14th Street Studios in Austin, Texas. Syncreate logo design by Dreux Carpenter.
If you enjoy this episode and want to learn more about the creative process, you might also like our conversations in
Episode 35: Navigating the Creative Wilderness
Episode 49: Creativity in Challenging Times
Episode 82: Healing the Creative Wound
At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you’re not sure how to get it off the ground, please reach out to us. Our book, also called Syncreate, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals. We also offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world, including a Monthly Creativity Coaching Group. You can find more information here on our website, where you can also find all of our podcast episodes.
Find and connect with us on social media and YouTube under Syncreate, and we’re now on Patreon as well.
If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review!
We’d love to hear your feedback as well, so drop us a line at [email protected].
EPISODE-SPECIFIC HYPERLINKS
The Syncreate Book
Charlotte Gullick’s Website
Book - 10 to 25: The Science of Motivating Young People by David Yeager, PhD
Book - The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer
Charlotte Gullick’s Website
Book - 10 to 25: The Science of Motivating Young People by David Yeager, PhD
Book - The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer
EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:
Melinda: Creativity and community are absolutely vital in challenging times. Welcome to Syncreate, a show where we explore the intersections between creativity, psychology and spirituality. We believe everyone has the capacity to create. Our goal is to demystify the process and expand the boundaries of what it means to be creative. We talk with visionaries and change makers, and everyday creatives working in a wide range of fields and media - from the arts to science, technology and business.
We aim to illuminate the creative process, from imagination to innovation and everything in between. I'm Melinda Rothouse and I help individuals and organizations bring their dreams and visions to life.
Charlotte: I'm Charlotte Gullick, and I'm a writer, educator, and writing coach. We are the co-authors of a book on the creative process, also called Syncreate. At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you're not sure how to get it off the ground, find us at syncreate.org. Our book, now available in both print and audiobook format, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals.
We offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world, including our monthly Creativity Coaching group. We'd be delighted for you to join us. We'd also love to hear your feedback on the show. Please drop us a line at [email protected]. We're looking for feedback on how we can improve the show, what's resonating for you and what future topics you'd like us to cover.
Hey everyone! Welcome back to the Syncreate Podcast quickie where Melinda and I are just sharing some thoughts on creativity and how you can use them to improve and enjoy your life. (Laughter) So, I think people around me are sick of hearing me talk about this book, 10 to 25. It's about the adolescent brain. It's by David Yeager. It's got a ton of research in it. It's just, as a parent, as a teacher, it’s really cool. And I've been thinking about it as it relates to creativity and the idea that we have a coach or mentor inside of us. So, that internal coach. And how does it speak to us, and how do we navigate expectations in relationship to that inner voice, to that inner coach and mentor?
So, Yeager proposes that the current paradigm that we have now is the enforcer and the protector. The enforcer is the mentor with really high standards and doesn't believe that supports are necessary. But protectors on the other side wants to lower standards and give high supports. Yeager says that we need to have both - really high standards and really high supports.
And I think, this is for me, it's just mind - I don’t want to say boggling - mind opening, to think that the way that I can ask myself to try out new things is - I want to learn to write a novel of this kind of genre. That's high expectations. And then, am I empowering myself for success? Am I giving myself the tools, the opportunities, the support that I need in order to get there? And I think - I don't know how it is in other mediums, so it'll be good to hear you speak about this as a musician - but I think a lot of times people come into writing with a lovely naive notion that, “Well, if I have talent, I'll be good at it right away.” (Laughter)
And then you're not generally. And then you're like, “Well, I guess I'm not a writer, because I don’t…” You know, so, like, thinking about how we set expectations for ourselves with our creativity and what kind of sports supports. Is that a coach, a writing coach? Is that a class? Is that a new book? Is that a podcast? What could that be that allows us to meet that standard, so that we do succeed, and then with joy?
Melinda: Yeah. And it's just interesting because it's like, why does it have to be either/or? Why not both? Like, you're saying it like we live in this kind of world, I think where things are black or white, you know. They’re sort of one extreme or the other. But yeah, we can have aspirations and high expectations for ourselves, but we can also be kind to ourselves and ask for help, and find the support we need, including with other people in community.
Charlotte: I also think it's really helpful in self-growth or self improvement, Yeager talks about this idea of logistical flexibility. So, particularly for teachers, a college student has a family emergency… old school thinking is you get it done or you take the incomplete. But could that student still meet the same standards but have some logistical flexibility? They need two weeks to go see their family, and then they can complete the project. And I think that's been really helpful because I think I am a very kind teacher.
And then I'm like, “Am I just soft? Am I just soft?” And I accept late assignments, because I want the student to do the assignment so that they get the value of the assignment, versus just being penalized and feel behind. And so when I heard that phrase ‘logistical flexibility’… like, “Oh, that's what I am. That’s what I'm doing.” And I'm like, I want to have that with myself. Like, you know, I write novels very, very slowly. Like, so slow. But now I'm okay with that because I have very high standards for myself. And one of the ways that I need high support is time.
Melinda: Yeah. Yeah. And time can be hard to find. It makes me think about also, in coaching, we talk a lot about the kind of internal critic or the saboteur. Right? And it's usually there to try to keep us safe in some way, you know? But then we also talk about the inner coach, or like, even in meditation, they say, ultimately you are your own best meditation teacher, right? And it's like, we have this wisdom and we kind of know what we need to do, but how can we ensure that our self-talk maybe is less on the critical side and more on the positive, encouraging side?
Charlotte: So, you know, recently I was involved in this pretty big event. And then usually what happens afterwards is, I just feel shame. “Oh, I said that in public?” Or like, “I can’t - or I was that vulnerable?” And then, you know, Brené Brown talks about the shame, or the vulnerability hangover. So, the night after I was going to sleep after the event, it started to happen. I started to feel that kind of shame wave. And so, my coach said instead, “You did really well. Really well.” And that's how I let myself just say that over and over, rather than sit in that feeling of, “I was too much in some way.” So, I do think it was a very physical shift from critic to coach.
Melinda: Yes. Yes. Yeah. That's beautiful. And I think it just goes to show, again, you know, Lama Dorje, who I was just speaking with, was talking about taking time at the end of the day to just inventory the day, and see what we're grateful for, as well as maybe what we might have done a little bit differently or what we might want to do next time. But just even acknowledging our successes, right? And just what we're grateful for at the end of the day is a way of kind of shaping our self-narrative.
Charlotte: I think that I've been talking a little bit about contributions. You know, at the end of the day, kind of going, “What were the contributions that I made today?” In one, I was walking down the hall and a colleague said, “Could I have a hug?” And I'm like, “Of course.” And she was shaking and I don't know what was going on with her and just, you know, hugged her for a little while and made her laugh, and then that was a huge contribution in our day.
And I think that kind of generosity towards others starts with that generosity towards ourself. And the coach who's helping us move in the direction of the person we want to be, rather than demanding with judgment that we must get there.
Melinda: Yes, absolutely. Great. So, what's our Pro Tip for today?
Charlotte: Our Pro Tip for today is to consider your self-talk. And this can be very challenging because like, “I don't have any self-talk,” or, “My self-talk isn't in explicit words.” But it might be feelings like, am I feeling generous toward myself after I just had that really difficult conversation? So, I think it's that check-in to kind of, I think, like, “What’s the atmosphere inside me?” Is it judgmental? Is it supportive? Is it accepting?
Is it saying, “Hey, flawed human… you just said something really difficult rather than, that was a stupid way to say that.” So, I think paying attention and if you're feeling really brave, write it down so you can start to gain some data. Because I think data can give you perspective, like, “Oh, I was feeling crappy about myself seven hours of the day. Like, this is not acceptable. We must work on this.”
Melinda: Yeah. I was just talking with a friend about how sometimes we have certain gifts or talents, but we downplay them. You know, like, “Oh, I don't know. That's weird.” Or, “I don't want to talk about it…” Or, “I don't want to be in the spotlight or whatever.” But just like, acknowledging ourselves for what we are bringing to the table in any given situation or context.
Charlotte: And does our inner voice - coach or critic - does it help us celebrate or does it help us shrink? With trying to pay attention again to the inner atmosphere. There's that book, The Untethered Soul, and it talks about if most of us, if we had a roommate that talked to us the way that we talked to ourselves, we would evict them. (Laughter)
Melinda: Yeah. Right. Exactly. Be a kind inner roommate to yourself.
Charlotte: Yes. Be a kind inner roommate.
Melinda: Find and connect with us on YouTube and social media under @syncreate. If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review. And again, we'd love to hear from you. So if you have feedback on any of our episodes, you've tried out the Pro Tips, you have thoughts on potential guests or topics, please drop us a line.
Charlotte: We're recording today at Record ATX Studios in Austin with Charlotte (me!) joining us from the Hudson Valley. The podcast is produced in collaboration with Mike Osborne at 14th Street Studios. Thanks so much for being with us, and see you next time.
We aim to illuminate the creative process, from imagination to innovation and everything in between. I'm Melinda Rothouse and I help individuals and organizations bring their dreams and visions to life.
Charlotte: I'm Charlotte Gullick, and I'm a writer, educator, and writing coach. We are the co-authors of a book on the creative process, also called Syncreate. At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you're not sure how to get it off the ground, find us at syncreate.org. Our book, now available in both print and audiobook format, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals.
We offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world, including our monthly Creativity Coaching group. We'd be delighted for you to join us. We'd also love to hear your feedback on the show. Please drop us a line at [email protected]. We're looking for feedback on how we can improve the show, what's resonating for you and what future topics you'd like us to cover.
Hey everyone! Welcome back to the Syncreate Podcast quickie where Melinda and I are just sharing some thoughts on creativity and how you can use them to improve and enjoy your life. (Laughter) So, I think people around me are sick of hearing me talk about this book, 10 to 25. It's about the adolescent brain. It's by David Yeager. It's got a ton of research in it. It's just, as a parent, as a teacher, it’s really cool. And I've been thinking about it as it relates to creativity and the idea that we have a coach or mentor inside of us. So, that internal coach. And how does it speak to us, and how do we navigate expectations in relationship to that inner voice, to that inner coach and mentor?
So, Yeager proposes that the current paradigm that we have now is the enforcer and the protector. The enforcer is the mentor with really high standards and doesn't believe that supports are necessary. But protectors on the other side wants to lower standards and give high supports. Yeager says that we need to have both - really high standards and really high supports.
And I think, this is for me, it's just mind - I don’t want to say boggling - mind opening, to think that the way that I can ask myself to try out new things is - I want to learn to write a novel of this kind of genre. That's high expectations. And then, am I empowering myself for success? Am I giving myself the tools, the opportunities, the support that I need in order to get there? And I think - I don't know how it is in other mediums, so it'll be good to hear you speak about this as a musician - but I think a lot of times people come into writing with a lovely naive notion that, “Well, if I have talent, I'll be good at it right away.” (Laughter)
And then you're not generally. And then you're like, “Well, I guess I'm not a writer, because I don’t…” You know, so, like, thinking about how we set expectations for ourselves with our creativity and what kind of sports supports. Is that a coach, a writing coach? Is that a class? Is that a new book? Is that a podcast? What could that be that allows us to meet that standard, so that we do succeed, and then with joy?
Melinda: Yeah. And it's just interesting because it's like, why does it have to be either/or? Why not both? Like, you're saying it like we live in this kind of world, I think where things are black or white, you know. They’re sort of one extreme or the other. But yeah, we can have aspirations and high expectations for ourselves, but we can also be kind to ourselves and ask for help, and find the support we need, including with other people in community.
Charlotte: I also think it's really helpful in self-growth or self improvement, Yeager talks about this idea of logistical flexibility. So, particularly for teachers, a college student has a family emergency… old school thinking is you get it done or you take the incomplete. But could that student still meet the same standards but have some logistical flexibility? They need two weeks to go see their family, and then they can complete the project. And I think that's been really helpful because I think I am a very kind teacher.
And then I'm like, “Am I just soft? Am I just soft?” And I accept late assignments, because I want the student to do the assignment so that they get the value of the assignment, versus just being penalized and feel behind. And so when I heard that phrase ‘logistical flexibility’… like, “Oh, that's what I am. That’s what I'm doing.” And I'm like, I want to have that with myself. Like, you know, I write novels very, very slowly. Like, so slow. But now I'm okay with that because I have very high standards for myself. And one of the ways that I need high support is time.
Melinda: Yeah. Yeah. And time can be hard to find. It makes me think about also, in coaching, we talk a lot about the kind of internal critic or the saboteur. Right? And it's usually there to try to keep us safe in some way, you know? But then we also talk about the inner coach, or like, even in meditation, they say, ultimately you are your own best meditation teacher, right? And it's like, we have this wisdom and we kind of know what we need to do, but how can we ensure that our self-talk maybe is less on the critical side and more on the positive, encouraging side?
Charlotte: So, you know, recently I was involved in this pretty big event. And then usually what happens afterwards is, I just feel shame. “Oh, I said that in public?” Or like, “I can’t - or I was that vulnerable?” And then, you know, Brené Brown talks about the shame, or the vulnerability hangover. So, the night after I was going to sleep after the event, it started to happen. I started to feel that kind of shame wave. And so, my coach said instead, “You did really well. Really well.” And that's how I let myself just say that over and over, rather than sit in that feeling of, “I was too much in some way.” So, I do think it was a very physical shift from critic to coach.
Melinda: Yes. Yes. Yeah. That's beautiful. And I think it just goes to show, again, you know, Lama Dorje, who I was just speaking with, was talking about taking time at the end of the day to just inventory the day, and see what we're grateful for, as well as maybe what we might have done a little bit differently or what we might want to do next time. But just even acknowledging our successes, right? And just what we're grateful for at the end of the day is a way of kind of shaping our self-narrative.
Charlotte: I think that I've been talking a little bit about contributions. You know, at the end of the day, kind of going, “What were the contributions that I made today?” In one, I was walking down the hall and a colleague said, “Could I have a hug?” And I'm like, “Of course.” And she was shaking and I don't know what was going on with her and just, you know, hugged her for a little while and made her laugh, and then that was a huge contribution in our day.
And I think that kind of generosity towards others starts with that generosity towards ourself. And the coach who's helping us move in the direction of the person we want to be, rather than demanding with judgment that we must get there.
Melinda: Yes, absolutely. Great. So, what's our Pro Tip for today?
Charlotte: Our Pro Tip for today is to consider your self-talk. And this can be very challenging because like, “I don't have any self-talk,” or, “My self-talk isn't in explicit words.” But it might be feelings like, am I feeling generous toward myself after I just had that really difficult conversation? So, I think it's that check-in to kind of, I think, like, “What’s the atmosphere inside me?” Is it judgmental? Is it supportive? Is it accepting?
Is it saying, “Hey, flawed human… you just said something really difficult rather than, that was a stupid way to say that.” So, I think paying attention and if you're feeling really brave, write it down so you can start to gain some data. Because I think data can give you perspective, like, “Oh, I was feeling crappy about myself seven hours of the day. Like, this is not acceptable. We must work on this.”
Melinda: Yeah. I was just talking with a friend about how sometimes we have certain gifts or talents, but we downplay them. You know, like, “Oh, I don't know. That's weird.” Or, “I don't want to talk about it…” Or, “I don't want to be in the spotlight or whatever.” But just like, acknowledging ourselves for what we are bringing to the table in any given situation or context.
Charlotte: And does our inner voice - coach or critic - does it help us celebrate or does it help us shrink? With trying to pay attention again to the inner atmosphere. There's that book, The Untethered Soul, and it talks about if most of us, if we had a roommate that talked to us the way that we talked to ourselves, we would evict them. (Laughter)
Melinda: Yeah. Right. Exactly. Be a kind inner roommate to yourself.
Charlotte: Yes. Be a kind inner roommate.
Melinda: Find and connect with us on YouTube and social media under @syncreate. If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review. And again, we'd love to hear from you. So if you have feedback on any of our episodes, you've tried out the Pro Tips, you have thoughts on potential guests or topics, please drop us a line.
Charlotte: We're recording today at Record ATX Studios in Austin with Charlotte (me!) joining us from the Hudson Valley. The podcast is produced in collaboration with Mike Osborne at 14th Street Studios. Thanks so much for being with us, and see you next time.
